Parenting…Step or Otherwise

    Lets face it, parenting, let alone step parenting, t’aint easy in this whirlwind world we live in.  In this section we hope to have an honest discussion about parenting, both the 1.0 (standard) version and the 2.0 (Step) version.  Everything from introducing kiddos to the new love in ones life to just plain being there when it matters most.  We will share our experiences in this department and we welcome yours. So if you have questions and or comments on the subject feel free to join our conversation today.  We welcome it!!

Mike & Nancy

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Chapter Three – Getting to know you

     Now that I had Nancy’s number and had reveled in the joy of obtaining it the tough part lay before me – actually ringing her up.  Personally, calling Nancy for the first time was a lot more challenging than one might expect.  At the time, I was 44 years old but still had that feeling of nervousness that went with calling a GIRL up for the first time!  Well, I summoned up my courage and dialed away.  We had kind of prearranged a time to talk with one another after her daughters bedtime so I knew she would be there.  Low and behold she answered right away!  For about ten seconds there was this semi-awkward, hi Nancy?, yes, is this Mike? identifier round.  We quickly got past the initial pleasantries and started on a glorious voyage of discovery of getting to know one another in the “real world”.

     Her voice was pleasant and lilting and when I joked she had a giggle that is music to my ears to this very day.  Nancy and I seemed to be getting along quite nicely. we were discovering our likes and dislikes in a wide variety of topics from music, to movies, to cheese (once agian), to not liking people who camped out at 45 m.p.h. in the “fast lane” of the freeway!  We spoke for, I don’t know, maybe 45 minutes in our first conversation.  No awkward silences, no thinking – oh my god did she REALLY say that!, it was quite without effort that we carried on our conversation.  After our first conversation I was on cloud nine the rest of the evening and I’m sure most of the next day.  We had made arrangements to talk with each other again “after hours” that evening and I couldn’t wait to hear her voice again.  Once again, we had a wonderful conversation that included more likes and dislikes, historical data, and how each others day went overall.  I know this may not sound very exciting but it was.  We were forming a connection and we both knew it.

     It was a couple of days before ChristmasIMG_20131214_135219_085 and Nancy informed me on our third consecutive evening of speaking with one another that she would be going to Gearhart, Oregon with her family for a post holiday respite for a week or so.  I asked if it would be ok to call her there and she said… of course!  Christmas day came and we both spent the day with our respective families.  Though from time to time I’d think of what Nancy might be doing.  Through the modern wonder of texting we wished each other a Merry Christmas and agreed to speak with one another in the evening after she had settled in at the Gearhart house.  Woot! A phone date!

     So things were going well.  We enjoyed speaking with one another and my thoughts turned to asking Nancy out for a first date.  This was a tricky time of year to ask someone out for a date though.  Christmas had just past and New Year’s was approaching fast.  I mean, Nancy and I were not going to go out for a New Year’s Eve celebration for our first date yet I didn’t want seem to be putting her off either.  So that evening when we spoke I mustered my courage once again and popped the next “big question” – “Would you like to meet up for a cuppa coffee or a bite to eat sometime”? I know…gutsy move Maverick… but my question was well received and met with “as long as you don’t pick me up in a white panel van with no windows….sure”  Hooray! I thought to myself.  We said our goodnights that night and after our conversation I came to the realization that I now had to plan something for us to do! Eh, I’ll figure it out.

–Mike

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“Keeping it easy”

      If you’ve been lucky enough to make it through the jungle of a divorce, got your courage up and put yourself back out there in the dating pool, and by some wild stretch of the imagination found that perfect someone to get hitched to then guess what?  YOU WIN! Woot!  Sounds easy enough doesn’t it? (A wee bit of sarcasm there)

     After Nancy found each other there was a theme to our relationship that we noticed time and time again.  In fact, I do believe its incorporated into our marriage vows.  That theme?  Being with you is effortless. In this section we will give out tidbits and examples of how to be an effortless couple and more important… keep it easy.

Mike & Nancy

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Re-marriage…

     In our re-marriage category we will explore those relationships that “could….go….all….the…..way”.  All the way to re-marriage.  I say re-marriage because this is a blog about life after divorce.  Re-marriage, as I have observed in many cases, is a wonderful journey that carries with it so many facets.  Those facets are what make up the meat and potatoes of this blog.  We will share our story of love and re-marriage and we hope you will share yours.

Nancy & Mike

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“All That Jazz”?

All that jazz” will be explained in the very near future.  Stay tuned for chapter four of “our story” for an explanation of this.  We think you’ll enjoy this section.

Mike & Nancy

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Chapter Two – The rating game

     The “rating game” is what I like to call the series of events that may or may not lead up to a date after you come in contact with someone on an online dating site, however, a similar process comes into play when you meet someone in the real world as well. The rating game can consist of everything from looking at a picture of your potential date and noticing a spill or stain on their clothing (clearly a dis qualifier) to learning that they support some sort of industry, political party, or pizza place that you don’t, to being just plain incompatible in some sort of peculiar fashion.

     The rating game for Nancy and I must have begun with checking each other out in our bios on OK Cupid.  I liked what I read and I liked what I saw.  Although her pictures really did NOT do her justice.

Mike and Nancy

     Anyhoo, after I came up with THE most incredible opening line ever, Nancy and I set off on a journey of exploration using nothing more than the typed word!  How bizarre, this typing of messages back and forth and actually having the thoughts and conversation flow with ease.  How modern this is I thought. We continued messaging each other back and forth exchanging thoughts, ideas, opinions and it was great!  I like this person!

     After somewhere around the half hour to forty five minute mark in our conversation I made my mind up to pop “the question”, NO not THAT question but the one question that has both plagued and delighted men of the modern age, that question, “can I have your number”?  I didn’t blurt it out in such a clumsy way but rather wrote “can I call you sometime”?  She typed her digits in the next message and that feeling of pure euphoria you get when you make a connection washed over me.  Round one of the rating game had come to a delightful conclusion.  The next round would be the “can we hold a conversation over the phone round” little did I know what her voice and manner would be but I was very much looking forward to finding out.

Feel free to share any “rating game” stories you might have through a comment…

Mike

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Dating…again

     Well, if our bedroom category encompasses all things associated with love then what goes “hand in hand” with love but dating?  However, not just dating in the sense of the “traditional” boy meets girl, falls in love, blah, blah, blah… dating, but rather woman meets man, man meets woman, man meets man, or woman meets woman ( I’m sure I left out other possibilities but you get the idea) in the comedic theater of post divorce dating.  Anyhoo, we hope to explore all aspects of the trials and tribulations of anyone that has put themselves back out there again and found it to be, “challenging”, in this section of our blog.

So share a dating horror story, or success story today by leaving a comment…

Mike & Nancy

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Chapter One – First Contact

     The story of us begins on a cold December evening in the Pacific Northwest. I in Camas, Washington she in Portland, Oregon.  Both of us had been through a divorce not that long ago and now happened to be looking in on our “OK Cupid” profiles.  I found Nancy’s profile and started reading it.  Now I know what your thinking… reading it?? Nobody actually reads those do they??.  But I assure you I read the whole thing as it was very interesting to me.  The thing I found most interesting? Cheese, yes cheese, she had written that she loved cheese and the stinkier it Roquefort Cheesewas the better. This stinky cheese loving woman was very much an intriguing person to me already!  While mulling the cheese, her interests, and the photos of Nancy over in my head, I noticed that a little dot indicating that she was online at that moment was showing she was there.  Wow, I thought to myself, I should ping her and see if she responds!  So I summoned up my courage and thought of the wittiest opening line modern man has ever come up with.  I wrote, “Cheese eh”?, thinking I would NOT get a response but hold the phone I did!  Her response, “Yes, the stinkier the better”.  Instantly I thought, this is going to be interesting…

This is the beginning of our story… feel free to share your stories.

Mike

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The Living Room

All things pertaining to “living”. So in the living room we will talk about everything from things in life that make us happy to things that present a challenge to us on a daily basis.

M & N

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The Bedroom…

     This is where we hope to explore all the things associated with love.  From that first date to the “I do” and everything in between.  Oh yeah, and “All that Jazz”. Ooo, la la!

Mike & Nancy

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